the pieces she lost and found
“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way …” — psalm 46:1-2a — — — — — one year ago, someone got to see what the inside of my brain looked like. 365 days. five hundred, twenty-five thousand, six hundred minutes, … Read more
around the world
at about this time last year, i was angrily dealing with the reality that i couldn’t go to germany on my church’s two-week trip because i had to have brain surgery. brain surgery, of all time-consuming, vacation day-sucking things! then it turned out no one went, after all, because there weren’t enough people who … Read more
“a patient etherised”
let us go then, you and i, when the evening is spread out against the sky like a patient etherised upon a table … t.s. eliot, the love song of j. alfred prufrock — let us sit then, you and i, in the silence, in the gloom of a winter-darkened afternoon; let us sit, and … Read more
should you find yourself curious …
… this is what my staples looked like. they certainly made a neat job of it. now all the staples are gone and my hair is coming in again fuzzy.
here, now
today being tuesday, this is the beginning of my second week home from all my hospital adventures. life right now is kind of a strange feeling. i guess maybe it’s a compilation of being home all the time, not being able to drive, and generally recovering from having things removed from my brain. i feel … Read more
willing to be brave
“you must never lose faith. you must never lose heart — God will restore your trust. and i know you’re afraid, i’m as scared as you are, but willing to be brave … brave enough for love.” — “brave enough for love,” from jane eyre, the musical today marks a week until my surgery. it … Read more
“show me how to die”
You could plant me like a tree beside a river You could tangle me in soil and let my roots run wild and i would blossom like a flower in the desert but for now, just let me cry — You could raise me like a banner in the battle and put victory (like a … Read more
what will you?
currently reading: my life in france, by julia child with alex prud’homme verdict: her descriptions make even escargot sound delicious. and it cinched my decision to take french next year. aside from following the written accounts of monsieur and madame child’s adventures in gastronomy and gallic living, i have been checking things off my mental … Read more
ashes, ashes
current tuneage: great lake swimmers, lost channels currently reading: deuteronomy just for the sake of clarification, this is what’s going on in my brain. no cancer, no tumor, no life-threatening condition (at the moment). the risk of something going wrong just increases 2% every year it goes untreated, so the likelihood of that happening would be much … Read more
“something ridiculous”
when i was eight, i had a horrible headache that felt like the insides of my head were being torn out. or at least that’s what i remember it like now. the doctor said the problem was caused by something that’d been there since i was born. or, rather, hadn’t been there — and that was … Read more
